Han – The Queens of Geekdom

Why So Triggered? (aka why Karen Gregory’s I Hold Your Heart and Holly Bourne’s The Places I’ve Cried in Public are important novels)

This post has remained unpublished for a year. Last year it was about writing down my fears and thoughts that lead to panic attacks and never ending tears.

Now, I’m stronger. Now, thanks to Karen Gregory and Holly Bourne, I am able to quieten that voice that told me it was all my fault….

22nd July 2018

I’ve just finished work for 6 weeks, I should be so unbelievably happy right? Instead of feeling the chill, I’m more anxious than ever.

Upon returning home from an amazing hen do, I found myself amid one of my worst panic attacks in a long while. My route home was closed and it was suggested that I simply get the Piccadilly line.

Simply!

Only, there’s nothing simple when it comes to taking the Piccadilly line from central London. You see, Dick lives on the Piccadilly line. Not only that, but Dick’s ex lives on the Piccadilly line. Pray, how’d you know that?! Well Dick pointed out the very flat they shared on one of his ‘you’ll never be as good as her’ power trips. ‘I pay for it’ he informed me, like I’d care… right before I was made to pay for dinner ‘because you don’t deserve my money as much as her’.

The very thought of bumping into either of them not only has my breathing out of whack, it pulls out my soul and pushes me to the brink of what I’d imagine death would feel like. I’ve been painted the monster in her story and I’m not inclined to put her right. She wants someone to hate so she gets to keep Dick in her life. More fool her; he’s a narcissist who I met on a dating site. I didn’t steal him; according to his profile he was single and had been for a long time. This was a man who told me he wanted to pick a place close to me so moving in together would be easy; long before he told me that they’d still been together when we first met and there was overlap. Not only of me, but of a woman he cancelled our first date for (telling me he had to go see his dad) because he was garenteed sex with her and not with me. (That, was not the issue. The issue was him telling me he was out of town at his family home instead of being honest)

I have PTSD and the distance doesn’t help. It’s easier than ever to convince myself I was the one in the wrong. That I’d been ‘obsessed’ as he’d put it the last time I saw him; erasing the fact that he said he loved me first, that he’d never felt this way about anyone and that he’d covered up the fact that he was screwing 3 other women and had been since way before me and only told me because it was the only way to explain the fact that he couldn’t be my boyfriend. (Despite him asking, not me, and changing his mind without telling me three days later)

It’s a horrible thing to say, but I wish his abuse had been physical… this psychological torture he put me through, cutting me off from everyone I knew and manipulating me to the point of explosion, to then scream and shout at me for ‘over reacting’… I don’t know if those scars will ever heal.

I can’t face YALC on the off chance she’ll be there. I don’t go to signings any more because I feel she ‘deserves’ them more than me and i can’t go to Hammersmith without preparing myself for days in bed afterwards because I’m prettified I’ll bump into him.

It hurts but I feel like she has to come first. Clearly she got Richard, while I got Dick. I reached out thinking she’d understand. Oh how I needed someone to understand and tell me there was life beyond Dick. She’d met someone else and moved on; I experienced ‘depression Dick’ for a month to prove it. I just … well, I wanted to know her for her (having to hear about her everyday, you kind of get to know a person and, in all honesty?! She sounded fucking awesome and someone I’d get along with. Dick actually hated that. He hated that I respected her and actually took her side when he went on a rant about her having a boyfriend) but I think she thought it was to keep my ‘claws’ in Dick.

Sorry kiddos, but when a bloke has you in your FAVOURITE restaurant and tells you he’s considering making the girl you were told ‘wasn’t an issue’ his girlfriend, that in comparison you’re ordinary and recounts her sexual preferences (certain things he’d denied you when you asked) that he is happy to do this act because ‘he’s in love’ in a bid to make you react … you don’t want to keep in touch. You want your memory bleached of him. The ONLY thing you wanted was; the feeling of safety and belonging within a community and I was hoping I could avoid a Dick smear campaign (Dick had banned me from attending the 2017 YALC because she would be there so I feared …)

… … … … …

That’s where it ends. I considered finishing that sentence, but whatever I put now won’t be right.

I’m also aware, having had the woman my first boyfriend left me for 10 years ago lurk on my Insta Stories for almost two weeks, perhaps trying to befriend the exes ex was the brightest of moves. It was weird, stupid and not something I would normally do.

I Hold Your Heart by Karen Gregory is out now
The Places I’ve Cried in Public by Holly Bourne is out 3rd October 2019 but samplers and the chance to win a proof will be up for grabs at this year’s YALC.

YALC 2019

I will not be attending YALC this year. However, this is more about the fact that I’ve returned to Liverpool to care for my father than PTSD triggered anxiety. Plus, for all the books, photo ops and autographs I’d be wanting… I’d need a lotto win to accommodate. Nah… I’m going to spend next weekend curled up on the couch in the room next door to dad and reading my eyes out.

I will be missing some amazing people. Some wonderful women within the world of YA. I have found my people and I love them dearly.

Love Han x

Why the Exam Process is Fundamentally Flawed in England!

Consider this a Will McAvoy style rant, in part inspired by a conversation I had with the wonderful Non Pratt and our viewing of the GCSES2019 feed yesterday. Enter at your own risk… All views are my own and don’t seek to throw shade on any school I’ve worked in, but instead the government that is needing a detention!

I’ve been out of teaching four months now and I’m still trying to come to terms with the fact that the state of education is not what I signed up for 10 years ago.

I have always been the sort of teacher who is proud of every child, regardless of their result. There is one condition; they have had to have tried their best.

Why? Why am I someone who never wrote “I’m disappointed” or “Must do better.”? Mainly because each and every year we put thousands of students (and teachers) into our own brand of kobayashi maru.

Right now it’s the Easter holidays for most schools. But their doors are not closed. Teacher’s have spent the week’s before scrambling Battle Royale-style to claim students for their ‘Easter School” and are currently making their way home from an intensive day of revision.

Students on the other hand are venting their frustrations on Twitter. Overwhelmed, stressed and anxious; year 11 students are making themselves ill.

I’m no longer on the front line, reassuring students that their health is more important and giving them the easy methods and tricks to revision; something I’d integrated into year 9 once I’d realised the new specifications where mere memory tests and no longer a test of anyone’s ability or skill. After all, revision at such an early stage moves information from short term memory to long term.

There are so many overlapping problems that I’m not certain where you would even start when it comes to fixing the issues.

Firstly, there is the issue of grading. Certainly since I started to train back in 2009 grade boundaries have been set not only post-exam, but post marking. This actually infuriates me. For the previous specification that ran for five years, there was an average increase on all grade boundaries of 5 – 10% until the passing C grade was an eye watering 70%. Only yesterday I saw a student wishing for everyone to do badly so that they could pass. No child’s grade should rest on the performance of others.

It also puts teacher’s in a stressful position. The one question that was posed to me repeatedly over the last few years has been ‘how many marks do I need to get the next grade?’ I answered in a way that perhaps the educational system was not wanting, but was perhaps the most honest; I didn’t know. I could tell students how to revise, I could give students the skills to answer the questions, but I could not tell them a true answer to what would help them cut corners. Student’s never liked it and only some understood. However, had I actually blagged an answer that would have placated them, but remove any flexibility in answering questions and any value to what I was teaching beyond the exam season.

Some teachers however do answer the question and it does give students confidence. However, they sit the exam and they do well. They jump through the hoops. Then, someone post-exam makes those hoops smaller. WHY? Why is that okay? Why is that fair?

Exam questions are assigned points based upon their complexity. Some subjects have their questions written at the start of the specification. If these questions have a value and demonstrate a skill; those grade boundaries should be fixed; allowing students and teachers to know exactly where they stand and ensuring that the grades are a true reflection of individual’s hard work.

But of course, the government isn’t really interested in fixing grade boundaries in order to give a true reflection of individuals or their abilities. Those leaders of education within the government are too scared of having a ‘weak’ cohort, they don’t have faith in young minds or the professionals within a system they’ve never worked in.

Government wants good results and statistics so that the data can be compared with other countries who are working within the IB framework. Yup, not only have we allowed government to restrict choices; it’s of no benefit to those who go through the stress.

Instead of pushing back against this, we’ve assimilated. Teacher’s pay, health and happiness in a vocation they’ve probably chosen long ago (I know I did) has been sacrificed so Britain can have a pissing contest with France and all those other countries we’re trying so hard to break away from.

This skewed motivation for the exam results is then filtered down. It skews how we teach; instead of the skills and independence that will enable a year 11 to answer ANY question, we (and I was guilty of this) throw out formulas and rigid methods of answers questions. Last years GCSES2018 feed was full of students before the English exam petrified that they would only be able to answer a question on three characters within Of Mice and Men; Lenny, George and the bird in the red dress.

We do it because we are pressured into grade orientated goals. We’re given a % pass rate target for a class, often irrespective of the ability. One year, early in my career I worked my arse off to drag some disenfranchised and unfocused students up to a predicted grade C. Was I thanked in the three weeks before the exam? Nope, I was asked what I would do to get them a B! These were students who were targeted Ds and Es. And my pay progression depended on these students playing ball on the day.

The best set of results I ever got? They were ones the school didn’t care about as they were sat in year 10; meaning they don’t count towards the aforementioned pissing contest. It meant I was able to teach my 35 students a three year course, in a year after school. The cohort was independent, chilled and confident. Not only did they get awesome grades that smashed their targets, a year 8 sibling of one got a C! At no point did a single child whinge that I didn’t tell them something. They all knew it was on them and they were there because they wanted to be.

What needs to happen?

• Have set grade boundaries

• Stop comparing the country’s results to others

• Stop performance related pay being linked to exam success

• Let teachers do their god-damn job

• Stop ranking your schools by results

• Reform the exams so they’re skill and knowledge focused and not simply memory tests

• Put someone that has worked in a school in charge of education

TV Tag

Thank you so much Tanvi @ A Reader to Whatever End for tagging me for this. She clearly knows me very well because this tag is totally perfect for me – I’m a huge TV buff, I have grown up watching lots of soaps and dramas on television and binge watching is my favorite activity other than reading books. Just go ahead and checkout Tanvi’s blog for more amazing book reviews and other wonderful posts.
I have tried but there is going to be a lot of repetition in my answers below, because I’m very picky and have very few favorite shows and I love binge watching them. So, let’s get started.
From https://ksahitya.wordpress.com/about/

I’ve not been tagged. I just found it, liked it, tagged myself!
Hope you enjoy my answers
Han x

Favourite Shows

Grey’s Anatomy (2005 – Present) I love this show. I can’t explain my reasons, but this show is my life. From the first ‘seriously’ to undoubtedly teary last narration, this is MY show. I’ve even made a tag for the show, which is my top viewed post to date.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997 – 2003)
Stranger Things (2016 – Present)
Glow (2017- Present)
Friends (1994 – 2004)
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (1993- 1999)
Doctor Who (1963 – Present)
Suits (2011 – Present)
Line of Duty (2012 Present)
Lucifer (2016 – Present)

Favourite Genre

Sci-Fi has always been my genre. Crime/procedural dramas come a very close second, but its Sci-fi that has made me who I am today.

Least Favourite Show

Bojack Horseman
Archer

Most Rewatched show/ Favourite show to Binge Watch

Grey’s Anatomy Every year I start from the beginning and watch all the way through. Most of the time. Sometimes Izzy gets to me and I skip until she’s gone.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Gilmore Girls (2000 – 2007) I’m not sure I like this show all that much, but I find myself binge watching every year or so.
White Collar (2009 – 2014)
Stranger Things
Glow Season two landed on Netflix on a Friday. I put it on with the understanding that I would watch ONE episode… I think it was something like 1am and I’d finished the whole series.

Week-by-week or Binge

It depends. Shows like Line of Duty, Bodyguard and Star Trek Discovery work well as week-by-week as it allows each episode to be thought about and predictions to be made.
However, there are shows that just beg to be binged; whether you want to or not. Netflix shows like Stranger Things and Glow are ones that I binge like hell. Repeatedly.

Favourite TV Character

Amelia Shepherd; Private Practice (2007 & 2013) & Grey’s Anatomy. An unpopular choice for those who only have Grey’s to go off, but anyone who has seen the younger brain surgeon face her darkest moments in the Kate Walsh spin-off will understand just how much she’s been though.
Dr Julian Bashir; Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Chief Jim Hopper; Stranger Things I don’t think I really need to explain this one.

Favourite TV Ships

Neal Caffrey and Peter Burke; White Collar This is a total bromance. I love it because it shouldn’t work. Neal’s a conman and Peter’s the man who caught him. However, you just have to watch the emotional exchange in the series one finale to know that these two are soulmates in much the same way as Grey and Yang.
Jim and Maggie; The Newsroom (2012 – 2014) One of the reasons why The Newsroom ended too soon is the development of Jim and Maggie’s relationship. They’re one of the will they/ won’t they couples, but we never really get the pay off.
Paul and Hugh: Star Trek Discovery I love these two, mainly for the fact that their sexuality is simply there. It’s not commented upon and it allows for a better and deeper exploration of their characters and relationship.

Shows you Couldn’t Get into

Black List
Dexter
Grimm
Mr Robot

With both Mr Robot and Dexter, it was about the narration that runs throughout the episodes. I just can’t marry the narrative and the visuals together. It’s a shame because I love both of the main actors.

Shows You Fell Out of Love With

Lost (2004 – 2010)
Heroes (2006 – 2010)
Marvel’s Agents of SHEILD (2013 – Present)
Supernatural (2005 – Present)
House (2004 – 2012)
NCIS (2003 – Present)
The Big Bang Theory (2007 – 2019)

With all of these shows I lost interest in the stories and, more importantly, the characters. I shed light on Lost and Heroes in my post here.

Cancelled Too Soon

Selfie (2014)
Our Zoo (2014) The mini series that looked at the creation and opening of Chester Zoo by the Mottershead family could have easily gone on for a number of series. It was a blow to hear, long after the final episode aired, that there were no plans for a second series.
Newsroom There’s no denying that I started to watch this show for David Harbour, but I stuck around because the story had me hooked. Much like West Wing, this Sorkin produced drama was drawing from politically and socially prominent stories. I wasn’t ready for the end and I would happily welcome a recommission.
Pan Am (2011 – 2012) Yup, this show also has David Habour on it’s roster, but I did what the first few episodes back in 2011 when it aired late night on BBC2. This is a show that would have fairedsefore we only have 14 episodes of this wonderfully 60s show.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zqOYBabXmA

Guilty Pleasure Show

Selfie This show was amazing. A modern retelling of My Fair Lady/ Pygmalion with Karen Gillan and John Cho at the helm. Their chemisty and humour make this short-lived so bittersweet. You know Gillan’s Eliza and Cho’s Henry are meant to find each other. Unfortunately time was called on the show early into its run.
Once Upon a Time (2011- 2018)
Hex (2004- 2005)
Switch (2012)

Currently Watching

Grey’s Anatomy
Miracle Workers (2019)
The Flash (2014 – Present)
Arrow (2012 – Present)
Supergirl (2015 – Present)
DC’s Legends of Tommorow (2016 – Present)
Charmed (2018 – Present)
Star Trek Discovery
IZombie (2015 – Present)

I’m sure there are others but its hard to think. It’s like naming all of Santa’s reindeer.

Favourite Theme Music

Crystal Maze
Grey’s Anatomy
White Collar
Hex

The Characters You Love to Hate

Jez Heriot and Azazeal; Hex
Louis Litt; Suits Oh, Louis! There isn’t a character that’s made me facepalm as much as the Suits antagonist. I love him and his annoying over reactions.

SUITS — “Hitting Home” Episode 507 — Pictured: Rick Hoffman as Louis Litt — (Photo by: Shane Mahood/USA Network)

Favourite Swan Song Episode

Hex; S2 Ep13 The Showdown
Friends S10 Ep17&18 The Last One: Parts 1 & 2

If you’ve gotten this far, consider yourself tagged.
Drop me a message in the comments. Do you agree with any of my choices? Any shows you think I should give a second chance?

Love Han x

Jack Loves Rosie Blog Tour- Important Journeys

Rosie Loves Jack by Mal Darbon is one of my favourite reads of 2018. It hooked me from the first page and reduced me to tears by the delightful ending. It is my absolute pleasure to be part of this blog tour, telling you about my own journey of discovery.

Getting Lost and Finding Myself

In July 2016 I was in a weird place. I’d lost a bit of who I was while trying to be what I thought other people liked. Namely a boy. I’d convinced myself that if I lost enough weight, he’d at least look at me in away that wasn’t disgust. To me, he was beautiful, funny and I would have been happy for him to just be my friend.

He never did see me as anything other than ugly and pathetic and I didn’t speak to him again when I left my job in July. I was 3 stone lighter,but I was also beginning my journey into managing the chemical imbalance in my brain that had led to life defining anxiety and depression. I don’t think I’d ever hated myself more.

One of my favourite people in the whole world suggested a trip to Oban and the Outer Hebrides by way of landing on the beach of Barra. I jumped at the chance and hoped time away would mend my broken soul.

Finding Myself

One thing I decided before we left was that I would use this opportunity to try foods I wouldn’t normally. No burgers, no pizza and no salads. Being Scotland, my diet became primarily fish based. From the ‘best fish and chips’ to muscles, I tried it all.

The best part of this new mind set was trying oysters for the first time. London isn’t void of the shellfish; but they’re never cheap especially when you’re not certain you’ll like them. Turns out, I love them and that moment marked a much more experimental me when it comes to food.

Searching for gods in all the Ancient Places

My friend, knowing I was struggling with my mental health,found some ancient rituals that took place in the area we visited. One was sacrificing wine to the god in order to be given good health over the following year. I didn’t have any wine on me, so I’m hoping the grapes I chucked were accepted with equally good grace.

The other was to walk 7 times around the church in a clockwise direction to improve your mental outlook. Having waded into the sea to offer my grapes, I didn’t want to put on my shoes. I figures the surrounding area of the church in question would be grass so off I went down the path towards the church.

How wrong I was. Not only was the quarter mile to the church(only accessible by foot) pathed with sharp rocks and nettles, so was the entire path around the church; it was almost as if someone knew I was going to attempt to do this barefoot.

The first lap was unbearable and I considered giving up and just letting my friend complete it without me. That was when I noticed there was a small concrete section next to the wall of the building. If I was careful with my footing and pace; I could walk it pain free. And so I did.

There were the corners that were hard and if I took them too fast, my feet paid the price. However, the last two laps were taken without a single misstep. Not sure it was what I was meant to take away from the activity, but I certainly saw it as a perfect metaphor for my own mental health.

From God to a Naughty Dog

I wasn’t the only person who was lost on this holiday in the highlands. While trying to find out way to our fourth (possibly fifth?) hotel of the trip, we encountered what looked like a frightened and lost terrier dog.

After getting our directions from the Post Office that just so happened to be back the way we’d come, I decided to walk while my friend drove ahead. This was in the hopes of me capturing the lost looking pup and getting him back home. I should point out here that I’m a little bit like Hagrid; I’d spent the entire trip trying to stroke the cows and any other animals we happened upon.

However, I soon realised he had a cunning, yet dastardly, plan. The ankle height beauty would stand still, trembling until I got to grasping distance; when he’d run away at full speed. He then leapt over the grassy dip at the side of the road and waited on the other side. There was nothing for it but to jump over myself. Except I fell into the dip and plastered myself with mud. I swear I heard him laugh.

I gave up after that and decided to inform whomever lived at the house we’d just past, figuring that it must be theirs. The gentleman opened his door. Between myself and my friend, we explained that we’d seen this dog, that we’d tried to catch him and that if he was to hear about a lost dog we’d last seen it in what we assumed was his field.

“Oh, that’s Alvie! He’s forever getting out of my neighbour’s yard and causing mischief.”

Rosie Loves Jack is out now.

Review: Undrafted (15) by @MazzelloJoe

A review of the Joe Mazzello written and directed movie, Undrafted.

Time: 90mins
About: When twelve ragtag teammates set out to play what should be a meaningless summer intramural baseball game, it ends up becoming the most important game of their lives.
Director: Joe Mazzello
Trailer:

Buy it:

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Itunes

So, you’ve been to the cinema a hundred times to see Bohemian Rhapsody, you’ve basked in the awesomeness of Rami Malek and you’ve realised Joe Mazzello has spent way too long off your movie radar?

Well, my friends… it’s not that the clone of John Deacon has been off our screens since his electrifying stint on Jurassic Park, it’s just that he’s moved away from staring roles (Star Kid, Simon Birch) like he did in the 90s. I’ll be going back and looking at his other roles over the next few weeks, but I need to start with a special film.

Undrafted is clearly a work of passion and something close to the heart of Joe Mazzello; it’s based upon his own brother, John, and the local baseball team where the Mazzello brothers grew up. There’s such a sincerity and heart from the moment it starts that its a must watch for anyone who was won over by Joe’s charm in the Queen biopic. Just be warned; you’ll be begging for his next directorial offering once you’ve finished.

Plot
Its a simple plot, but don’t let that fool you into thinking this is a sub-par movie. The focus and charm is not in the plot, but the characters. It’s a bottle film; everything centers around a single baseball game and the team’s disappointment that one of their own didn’t make the cut.
Maz should have been drafted; everyone on the team knows it and their frustration is tangible. Last thing they need is to play against another local team who are prepared to play dirty to win. While Maz is the catalyst and the character who develops the most throughout the film, he’s not the only one who will keep you focused.
It feels like Remember the Titans meets Little Rascals in all of the right ways. You can’t help but love this team of angry misfits. From Palacco’s entrance and British twang, to Pat Murray’s half-time meltdown, you really get to understand what being undrafted means to everyone.
When it comes down to it, this film is about family. It’s about overcoming defeat, picking yourself up and dusting yourself off before starting again. Maz’s final act is one of wonderful growth and true cinematic climax. It’s through this development that the group truly become a team.

Casting
Tyler Hoechlin plays pitcher Dells. One of the brilliant things about an independent movie like Undrafted is that you get to spot people from your favourite shows. Hoechlin can currently be seen flying in and out of the CWs Supergirl as Clark Kent and his alter ego. He’s wonderfully heavy hearted and I do feel there’s more to know about his character than what is seen in the 90 minutes.

Casting Jim Belushi as the Mazzello patriarch was a stroke of genius. He provides a warmth and a wisdom that brings heart to the film; the relationship he has with Aaron Tveit’s Maz is delightful to watch. Knowing Belushi is portraying someone real only adds to his presence on screen.

Joe Mazzello is a powerhouse on this film. Not only does he write and direct, the man also takes on the role of Murray too. It’s a role unlike any I’ve seen Mazzello play (aside from Presumed Innocent and Wooly Boys, I think I’ve seen them all). The meltdown Murray has and his monologue is raw, emotional and frighteningly empowering. I am ashamed to say, grown up Joe Mazzello swearing his way through 90 minutes of game play had me giggling. I grew up with this guy in some of my favourite films, having him curse had me laughing like one of the kids I teach when I’m telling them off.

Sports
The very fact that I like this film, gives a good indication of how well it was made. I don’t think I like sports. Other than Ice Hockey, I haven’t watched a full match. Any football match I watched with my boyfriend-at-the-time was laced with cocktails. Lots and lots of cocktails. As a kid, I didn’t ‘watch’ the match; I heard them on the radio. It sucked and sort of ruined football for me.
However, what I do love are movies about sports; Escape to Victory, The Wrestler, The Damned United, Rocky and Eddie the Eagle are the tip of the iceberg when it comes to sports movies. Undrafted is no exception. I am none the wiser about the rules of the game but, bloody hell, I think if I was to go to a match I’d be hooked.

Over to you:
What’s your favourite Joe role?
What do you think of BoRhap?
What’s your favourite sports movie?

Love Han x

The Heartsick series by @ChelseaCain wrap up

Click on the title link below to see my coverage of individual books and commentary on who I’d cast in the prominent roles. Hint- David Harbour.
Keep on reading and you’ll see a link to my Pintrest board that might compliment Cain’s AWESOME work. I was tempted to make predictions on any upcoming Archie/Gretchen novels, but I really want to keep those to myself. However, I did once entertain the idea of writing a fan fic that saw Susan on a book tour in Europe. She managed to be held hostage on the London Eye which would have given nail biting ticking clock.

https://www.bookdepository.com/Heartsick-Chelsea-Cain/9780312657819?ref=grid-view&qid=1535216223272&sr=1-10=CappyCrash

Heartsick

Sweetheart

Evil at Heart

The Night Season
Kill You Twice
Let Me Go

My Pintrest Page

https://pin.it/r3zcf6omhoh6q7

So while reading this time, I started researching things (Namely Susan’s hair colours) and put them into a Pintrest board. Whenever my dad was talking AT me for so long that I could feel my vein popping in my head and I found myself reading the same line four or more times, I’d go into research mode.
Within the board you’ll find that it’s split into the individual books, with a separate one for Archie (David Harbour. Not going to lie, I’ve given up on anyone being cast other than that damn fine man! Follow him on Insta, I beg you.), a Misc one for Susan where it’s items of clothing she is described to wear more than once or I’m not sure which book it should be in.
I also spent some time falling in love with Portland and I’m now planning on going on holiday there in the next few years (read: ASAP).

Please enjoy and comment on any changes in casting you would have.

Love

Han x

#YALC Sampler Round Up One: @MKenneyPR , @akemidawn ,@HoJay92 & @mkhanauthor

City of Dust by Michelle Kenney
HQ
Kindle– 2 October 2018
PB– 13 December 2018
Book of Fire: Review & Buy

I fell back into this world like meeting up with a friend I’d not seen in forever. For both me and the story time has passed, but it feels like yesterday that I was racing through Book of Fire, as if the character’s chance of survival increased by my speed of reading. In the three chapter sampler, you are quickly caught up with the characters and their lives for the last year before Talia’s life is thrown a curve ball.
The sampler ends on a cliffhanger that will have everyone counting down to that release date.
For those who have yet to read Book of Fire, I suggest you get on it, post haste. It was one of my top reads for 2017 and I’ve been waiting with such anticipation for this sequel.

Summer Blue Bird by Akemi Dawn Bowma
Ink Road
Spring 2019
Starfish: Review & Buy

This five chapter sampler has such a powerful opening and lays down a solid foundation for what will be unfolded in 2019. From what I’ve read so far, the set up reminds me of Fly Away Home; my favourite film and worn out novelisation from when I was a kid.
It’s a testament to Bowma’s writing that I’m already attached to her characters.

A Good Girl’s Guide to Murder by Holly Jackson
Electric Monkey Press
2 May 2019
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/40916679-a-good-girl-s-guide-to-murder?from_search=true

“We dare you to put it down” states the tagline on the cover of the two chapter sampler. Believe me, I’m gutted I can’t meet that challenge. It’s short, but very effective and I already have so many questions and theories that I need more information to be certain.
There was already a buzz at YALC about this book and even from the pages I’ve had the privilege to read, I can tell this is going to be the big book for next summer.

Kick the Moon by Muhammad Khan
MacMillian
19 January 2019
First book: I am Thunder

I knew nothing about Khan’s second book and I knew that I wanted it in my life. I work as an RE teacher in a diverse school in which some students feel they are almost invisible to society. Unless of course, they’re the subject of negative press. There are others who love reading, but find characters they identify with are tokens and there merely to check a box. It’s wonderful to say ‘here, you are being represented.’
Imagine my delight when I discover that the book will center around a protagonist that loves comic-book heroes. Not only is this perfect for me, I know of at least five students who will be fighting to be the first one to read it come January.

I Was Born for This by Alice Oseman

About:

The third novel from the phenomenally talented Alice Oseman – one of the most talked about YA writers in recent years.
For Angel Rahimi life is about one thing: The Ark – a pop-rock trio of teenage boys who are taking the world by storm. Being part of The Ark’s fandom has given her everything she loves – her friend Juliet, her dreams, her place in the world.
Jimmy Kaga-Ricci owes everything to The Ark. He’s their frontman – and playing in a band with his mates is all he ever dreamed of doing.
But dreams don’t always turn out the way you think and when Jimmy and Angel are unexpectedly thrust together, they find out how strange and surprising facing up to reality can be.

I was waiting for this book for so long. I was anxious to get my hands on this book, as if there was a small window for it to be bought or it would be lost to me forever. I fully expect I wouldn’t have slept the night before it’s release date, had I not had the wonderful surprise of finding it in a Central London book shop, nestled in with the new releases, a few days before.

I love Alice Oseman’s writing and narrative messages so much that I abandoned what I was reading to start I Was Born for This. Once again, Oseman did not disappoint. There is so much to relate to in the book. It doesn’t matter if the fandom didn’t fit, the reactions and the emotions are still the same.
Me, I’m not so much a boy band following girl any more. I remember abandoning Westlife for Alice Cooper back in 2003 when I went to my first ever concert at 18, but before then I was firmly a Boyzone and Spice Girls fan. I’m also firmly in the tv and film fandoms and can completely relate to the meeting friends online, paying money to be involved in some event and even meeting some of the celebrities involved.

What, perhaps, is the most familiar aspect of the novel is the idea of perceptions. From the viewpoint of both Angel and Jimmy, they clearly think and feel differently to those around them. I loved how they were both explored for their negative and positive aspects.

How it came to an end was perfect; both Angel and Jimmy will make decisions in their lives that provide a fulfilling and satisfying ending. However, Oseman has given me people I love and I want to know more about them.

Ascension by Victor Dixen @VictorDixen

Release date: 28.6.2018
About:
Six girls, six boys. Each in the two separate bays of a single spaceship. They have six minutes each week to seduce and to make their choices, under the unblinking eye of the on-board cameras. They are the contenders in the Genesis programme, the world’s craziest speed-dating show ever, aimed at creating the first human colony on Mars.

Leonor, an 18 year old orphan, is one of the chosen ones.
She has signed up for glory.
She has signed up for love.
She has signed up for a one-way ticket.
Even if the dream turns to a nightmare, it is too late for regrets.
Pre-order here

Characters

I love Leonor. She’s a good voice to have when you’re stuck in space; she grounds you, so to speak. When you have a character like her; passionate, flawed and insightful. The way she works through the speed dating is interesting and something I easily identify with. Not only that, it adds a level of internal conflict that some narratives miss.

We learn bits about the other crew, but it’s those left on earth that are the most interesting. We have Serena, who communicates directly with the participants and becomes the ‘host’ of the broadcast. She’s a piece of work, you’ll quickly learn, but I want you to find that out for yourself.

Plot

It reads like a brilliant Sci-fi blockbuster. There are many threads in play and they change your perspective like a rubrics cube, waiting to be solved. Being the first in a trilogy, you go in knowing that you will have a resolve of some sorts, but there will be questions left unanswered to ensure you want more. It’s expertly done so that it doesn’t feel like it’s the first in a sequence, but a story in its own right.

Writing

Being a translated story, there’s always a worry that the writing loses something. This story, I’m delighted to say, doesn’t. It’s language is clean, its engaging and powerful. It makes for such a consumable, compulsive read.
I just wish I knew enough French to read the other two books in the series. Yes, they’re already published guys but you need to have progressed further than a GCSE in French to be able to access them.

Pinocchio

The National Theatre

2.12.2017 (2nd Preview performance)

Story

The story sticks very close to source. For me, having not read the book, that’s the Disney movie.

The songs, however, seem out of place but find new homes that fit well within the production.

It always has been a dark tale, and this interpretation is now exception. Even the joyous laughs and giggles from little ones can’t avert your mind from the evil that follows Pinocchio or the pain Geppetto feels.

Cast

It’s a wonderful ensemble of talented actors and puppeteers with stand out performances from Joe Idris-Roberts and Audrey Bisson who play Pinocchio and Jiminy Crickey respectively.

Idris-Roberts gives his all, and is anything but wooden as the young puppet on a mission to become a real boy. On, or off strings, he will charm you and disarm you. It’s Idris-Roberts who has me gearing for a second viewing.

Then there is the wonderful and playful Audrey Bisson. She plays and operates Jiminy Cricket; Pinocchio’s conscience. She has a delightful sense of timing and humour, bringing a wonderful and playful tone to the play.

Production (music, set, costume, lighting)

This was a beautiful set that used the lighting to give the audience a sense of size.

The use of puppetry was quite simply breathtaking.

The highlight for costumes for me was the Fox. Such a stunning outfit, complete with platform shoes to provide added height.

I hope to see this play again before it finishes in March.

Invictus by Ryan Graudin

Release date: 21.9.2017

Description: Time is running out . . .

Farway McCarthy was born outside of time. With nowhere to call home and nothing to anchor him to the present, Far captains a crew on a dangerous mission into the past.

When he collides with Eliot – a mysterious, secretive girl, whose very appearance raises questions about time itself – Far immediately distrusts her.

But he must take a leap of faith, following Eliot on a race against time, if he is to protect everything he’s ever loved from disappearing forever . . .

Buy here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/1510102868/ref=mp_s_a_1_13?ie=UTF8&qid=1514300221&sr=8-13&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=invictus

Characters

Far and Eliot are the most interesting of the group. I don’t find them relatable, but they’re certainly likeable. Far isn’t as much of a hot head as you first expect; he’s Harry Potter but lacking the ignorance of his upbringing.

Plot

It’s a wonderful time travelling plot, that doesn’t fall into the trappings that some other books fall into. It has a feeling of the tv show Timeless about it, but it quickly diverts from the individual cases of time travel to a much larger story.

Writing

It’s a solid novel, written in third person and doesn’t hold back on the action. It has a delightful way of incorporating swear words that reminds me of Eion Colfer’s Artemis Fowl.

I personally could have done with it being about 100 pages shorter, but I was having to drown out Christmas TV and my father’s chatter so I was pulled out of it a fair bit.

Happy Birthday Han

My birthday has been very hit and miss. From everyone being a no show for my 13th birthday party, to my father refusing to wish me happy birthday. Yep, there have been years that have SUCKED beyond belief and there have even been a good handful where I have sobbed myself to sleep the night before because I’d not want the day to arrive.

However, there’s one thing I have always loved, and that’s a trip to the cinema and a happy meal on the way home. Keep it simple and I’m happy.

1989- All Dogs Go to Heaven

1990- Little Mermaid

1991- Beauty and the Beast

1992- Aladdin

Interestingly, I was offered the chance to see this just before Christmas and I said no. Logic should have shouted ‘oi idiot; go and you get to see two films’ … alas, my sentimental heart won and it was saved until my birthday.

1993- Adams Family Values

1994- Miracle on 34th Street

1995- Indian in the Cupboard

1996- 101 Dalmations

1997- Spiceworld

This one breaks my heart. In my attempt to grow up, I would not let my mum come and watch with me and my friend. Back before the mass ownership of mobile phones; my mum spent the time in the McDonalds.

I’m sure she wasn’t cut up about missing the Spice Girls run around London.

1998
1999
2000
I sacrificed my love of movies for a home-based parties.

2001- The Princess Diaries

2002- Lord of the Rings: Two Towers

2003- Lord of the Rings: Return of the King

2004- Without a Paddle

My mum actually suggested this one. I’d wanted to see Ella Enchanted, but she was too ill to get ready for it as it had been out a while and there were very few showings. Worked out brilliantly; I love this film.

2005- The Producers/ Just Like Heaven/ Narnia

I’m not sure any of these were on my actual birthday. I sulked massively because my mum wouldn’t go with me. I didn’t appreciate how unwell she was… so, yeah, I sulked.

2006- Perfume

2007- Enchanted/ The Golden Compass

2008- Twilight

2009- Sherlock Holmes(January 2010)

I was in Ankara, Turkey in 2009. It was not a very good birthday seeing as my then-boyfriend was actually there to meet up with a potential new girlfriend. It wasn’t fun. The cinema trip was meant to be 10 people+, however it was snowed out so there was about four of us.

2010- Tron Legacy

2011- Sherlock Holmes, Game of Shadows

I don’t remember ANY of this movie past the first 20 minutes. I’d been for a meal before hand and had wine and I’d smuggled in some premixed cans. To this day? I’ve attempted to watch this film about 4 times and I STILL don’t know the plot.

2012 – The Hobbit/ Pitch Perfect

2013- The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

It counts… sort of. I got very drunk the night before, so a 3D screening was not the best idea.

2014- Exodus: Gods and Kings

2015- Snoopy Movie

My 30th birthday film. Such a good, and childish, call.

2016- Rogue One

2017- Back to the Future

This took place in my brother’s cinema room. He even selected a few trailers that would have most likely been on before it in the cinema. Quite possibly my favourite birthday to date.

2018

No movie. Quite possibly the worst birthday I’ve ever had.