Not so much a meme today, but it doesn’t stop it being an important part of depression that needs to be spoken about more. What Rebecca Hanson and Noah Berman highlight in this Wokesloth article and twitter feed is a ineffable symptom, trigger and, sometimes, cause of depression.
It’s true when Rebecca states that depression is an asshole. It’s not as simple as one particular thing becomes impossible. Each time I slip into an episode, a different, seemingly east task, becomes as climbing Mount Everest with an iron lung. Even worse, to outsiders it just appears that we’re lazy.
My impossible tasks have ranged from cleaning dishes, washing my hair and removing nail varnish. All very simple tasks, but even the thought of tackling them utilises so much energy, it’s always put off until ‘tomorrow’. Then you beat yourself up about it, to the point of exhaustion and the whole thing circles around again.
The most dangerous of impossible tasks for me always came when I was running low of medication. My depression and anxiety (Gollum) would tell me I wasn’t worthy enough to be graced with time off for a doctors appointment. My body told me it wouldn’t cope with a trip after work. So it remained as a ‘tomorrow’ task until I needed my medication ‘yesterday’.
It’s not an easy thing to overcome. Living alone, I was able to put some impossible tasks aside and pick them up when I was ready. Dry shampoo and mastering the braided plait helped with others. The medication was a whole different animal and once that suggested there were more problems than my depression. Safe to say, with all the apps available and a change of location, I shouldn’t find that too much of a problem again.
The only support I can give outside what appears in the article is that I’m here if you need me, be kind to each other and, most importantly, be kind to yourself.
Love always
Han x
The Queens of Geekdom 